Why do people try hard to make someone elsepay for their stupidity? There’s always someone who pays for people’s patetic behaviour and you know what, they dont really care. I mean who really cares? I have been realising whatever happens to me to you or to someone doesn’t really matter because others will just make stupid comments about it and then, after a minute, carry on with their stupid little life. It’s more like ‘let’s talk and make his life really hard and then, when the guy snaps and go nuts, lets call him freaky and put him away’ I really dont know why I still keep thinking about this shit because there’s no return, there’s no way round, people wont just mutate, society will only get worst and only a really small part of it will get better and thats fine but sometimes the consequences are lethal. Lets say someone just flips and do something like really bad like go into a killing spree like we have already seen so many times, who is there to blame?! Suicide doesnt just happens. I had a friend who comited suicide and people are still trying to figure out why he did it. But then, after a month or so, the others just carried on their lives and soon forgot about it, like he was a chair or something. That’s life. That’s humanity. So do not pretend to care, deep down, no one gives a fuck. The fact is that I dont really know what I am doing and waking up in the morning has been as hard as fly without wings. But my life, since 1998, has been about survive, put up with stupid people, trying to get by without snap and bust peoples head wide open. But that has made me stronger, I have grown stronger every time this little ugly people try to fuck me up. Thanks to budhism I have changed my perception and have learned to face stupidity as a lesson, a lesson for growth. Maybe its just me, you know. I know life is great and theres so much beauty out there and thats why I havent tried to quit again. And Im really happy for those who have had a great experience and can go about their dailly routine with a smile on their faces and all, but people have different experiences and people face life in a different ways. And thats beauty right there. Maybe I have had too much terapy and that has made me go into too deep,  maybe I am talking just bullocks, maybe…whatever….you will forget these words in five minutes or so……


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